


Sleep

by nanuk_dain



Series: Impossible Relationships [13]
Category: Generation Kill
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M, Post-OIF
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-02-10
Updated: 2012-02-10
Packaged: 2017-10-30 22:00:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,327
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/336609
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nanuk_dain/pseuds/nanuk_dain
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Bravo men return from deployment.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sleep

  


[   
](http://pics.livejournal.com/nanuk_dain/pic/000be3gq)

  


When the plane touched the ground stateside, Tim felt bone-deep relief wash over him. He knew it wasn't over – it never was – but at least he could relax, allow his guard to come down for the first time in ages. Here, nobody was shooting at them, nobody was setting up car bombs, nobody was going to try to kill them in their sleep. It felt like a long-forgotten luxury.

Tim let his head rest against the metal hull of the plane, feeling the vibrations of the engines, of the tarmac under the wheels while the plane taxied to its parking position. He closed his eyes for a moment and imagined what he'd do now that he had time off without the permanent threat of a whole country wanting to kill him. He would take a long shower, would let the water rain down on his body until all the crusted dirt, the countless layers of sand and sweat washed away and the water ran clean. It would take some time and a lot of water, but the prospective of being clean again, _really_ clean, was enough to make a smile tug on his lips.

Tim listened to the easy, relaxed chatter around him only with half an ear. He heard the smile in Poke's voice when he said that Gina and the girls were coming and waiting for him at the base. Tim knew nobody would wait for _him_. He hadn't told any of his family or friends when he was coming back. He'd call them in a few days, when he'd had the time to adjust, to get used to life outside of the war zone he'd become used to. He needed some time alone, to come down, before he could face any civilians without scaring them with the reflexes and habits he'd taken on while in a war zone.

He opened his eyes halfway and let his gaze wander over to Ray who was sitting with Brad, Hasser and Garza on the other side of the plane. He wondered if anybody was waiting for Ray. Tim realised that he didn't even know _who_ could be waiting for him - parents, brothers or sisters, friends? Tim knew for sure that there was no girlfriend, but that was it. There was so much he didn't know about Ray. Then he took in how the top of his bandana was visible under the collar of Ray's uniform and he hid a smirk. There were some important thing he _did_ know about Ray, though, and the rest would come with time. 

Once their plane had come to a stop, they were loaded into several buses that were waiting next to the planes. The atmosphere was loaded with pleasant anticipation, nobody wanted to wait any longer to wrap their arms around their families. The buses stopped and Tim watched the men disperse, caught in the warm, happy embraces of wives or girlfriends, children, parents, siblings. He got off the bus last and nodded goodbye to some of the men who casually saluted before they left to reunite with their families. All the while, Tim kept an eye on Ray who didn't appear hurried, didn't move like a man anticipating meeting his loved ones. He had his duffel thrown in front of his feet where he stood with Hasser who'd been welcomed by his whole family and a girl who was obviously his girlfriend. When they got ready to leave, Ray waved and stayed behind. 

Tim made his way over and stopped next to him. "Nobody here for you?"

"Nah, it's only my mom and my grandma, and it's way too far for them to come here." Ray replied casually and shrugged. "They're coming to the airport to get me when I fly over in a few days."

"What do you do until then?" Most of the men were gone and the base was strangely empty. After so much time spent in the constant presence of a whole platoon of other men, it felt weird to be alone.

Ray shrugged again. "I was planning to annoy Brad and take possession of his very comfortable couch."

"Stay at my place." Tim heard himself offer before he'd even thought about it. 

Ray didn't say anything, he just turned to look at Tim. After a moment, a grin spread over his face and he nodded. "How could I say 'no' to an offer like that?"

It was only when they'd picked up their duffel bags and had begun walking towards the parking lot that Tim realised that this was exactly what he wanted, what he _needed_. Ray, naked, under his hands, under his mouth, against his skin, warm and passionate and writhing with pleasure. Making all those sounds he'd always had to hold back in Iraq, letting them out without caring if anybody heard them.

Things didn't quite happen the way Tim had imagined, though. Before they had even left the base, Ray was leaning against the window of Tim's car, eyes closed and mouth hanging open in sleep. The exhaustion had won over his body at last, demanding the rest neither of them had got in Iraq. Ray didn't move at all, not even when Tim turned off the engine and its vibrations died down. 

Tim turned and took the opportunity to just look at him. Ray's face was relaxed in sleep and as if to confirm the cliché, he did look so much younger than when he was awake. There were deep shadows under his eyes, dark even against the tan of his skin; outward signs of exhaustion. Tim knew there was not a single one of the men who didn't show those signs, and it pained him that he had to wake Ray in order to get him up to his apartment. He knew how much Ray needed to sleep, how much good it would do his body and mind to have a full night of undisturbed rest.

Tim settled his hand on Ray's shoulder and gave it a light shake. "Josh, wake up. We're there."

Ray came awake immediately, a deeply ingrained reaction trained by not only his years with the Marines but especially by months spent in a war zone. He sat up straight and turned to look at Tim with a frown of momentary confusion. Tim understood it in a way nobody ever could who hadn't spent weeks inside a Humvee: Ray felt like he sat on the wrong side, like the dimensions and the layout of the car weren't correct, even the smell and feel of his surroundings weren't what he'd expected, and it took him a moment to realise his error - he wasn't in One Alpha's Humvee. 

They weren't in Iraq anymore.

Tim gave him a little reassuring smile and let his fingertips pass over the bare skin of Ray's neck in a subtle caress before he pulled back and opened his seatbelt. "Let's get upstairs."

Ray nodded and followed him out of the car and to the trunk to get their duffel bags. Tim led the way into the four-storey building where he owned an apartment on the top floor. He'd bought it to have a place close by when he came off deployments. It was his refuge, his sanctuary. He didn't want to live on base when he was stateside, and he needed his own space away from the other men when he was off duty in order to stay sane. So when he'd turned twenty-five, he'd bought this place after saving his pay for years. He'd had no plans to leave service anytime soon, it was his life after all, and no matter how often he wondered why he was still doing this, he knew he wouldn't quit. 

Ray entered the apartment behind him, letting his duffel fall to the floor in the hallway right next to Tim's. His gaze swept around while he walked through the rooms, checking out the spacious kitchen and the huge living room, throwing a glance into the bedroom and the bathroom. "Nice place you have here. Really big."

Tim was already shrugging out of his uniform jacket, eager to get out of the dirty clothes. Now that the deployment was over, he suddenly couldn't stand the smell and the dirt anymore. "It was an office building once, transformed in apartments about ten years ago."

"I hope you don't mind if I wait until tomorrow to have a closer look. Now I just want to sleep." Ray blinked and tried to rather unsuccessfully suppress a yawn. 

"Shower first."

"Why?" Ray looked at him as if he'd asked the impossible. "Can't that wait till after sleep?"

"We stink, Josh. And I don't want to have to change the sheets tomorrow because they stink like we do now."

Ray stood in the hallway as if he was overwhelmed by the demand to stay awake long enough to shower, looking lost. Tim went into the bathroom and started the shower to give the water time to heat up, then he just opened Ray's jacket and threw it on the pile of his own dirty clothes. Tim made sure the water was warm before he pushed a fresh towel in Ray's hands and made him step into the bathroom. 

Tim closed the door behind Ray and stared with a frown at his hand where it rested against the wood. The first shower after deployment was something special, a precious moment of winding down and a first step on the way back into a life that didn't include constant mortal peril. In all the time he'd served, Tim had never once shared this important moment with anybody, and he didn't want to ask something from Ray that he himself wasn't sure he was ready for yet. 

After a moment, he could hear Ray step under the water and a few seconds later there was a deep, heartfelt sigh. Tim just smiled and turned to gather their clothes and bring then in the laundry room next to the kitchen. He'd known a shower would make Ray feel human again in a way nothing else could. Not to mention that it was really nice to get rid of the smell that seemed to linger not only in their clothes but also in their hair, their very skin. 

When Ray came out of the bathroom about ten minutes later, he wore nothing but the towel around his hips. His hair was still wet and tiny droplets ran over his bare skin. Tim watched mesmerized how a drop passed over Ray's neck and down to his collarbone before it crossed the the bite mark Tim had given him, now slowly fainting. It continued over his chest, over the curved 'No Dice' tattoo that Tim had never seen in full light, to the plain of his stomach until it disappeared in the soft fabric of the towel. It left Tim's imagination with glimpses of what its further journey would have been, and Tim licked his lips in an unconscious reaction. 

"Your turn." Ray just said, not bothering to hide his smirk, and Tim knew he'd seen his gaze and had read his thoughts as if Tim had said them aloud. 

Tim didn't entirely trust his voice, so he just nodded and leaned in to press a soft, chaste kiss to Ray's lips before he entered the bathroom and closed the door. He removed his t-shirt and underwear and stepped into the shower stall, turning the water on. He closed his eyes and held his face under the spray, taking profound pleasure in the way the warm water ran over his skin, through his hair, taking away the grime and sweat of the past few weeks. He washed three times before the water came away clear. When he finally left the shower, he felt better than he had in months.

He rubbed the towel over his short hair before he dried his skin and pulled on a fresh pair of shorts. When he came out of the bathroom, Ray was nowhere to be found, neither in the kitchen nor on the couch in the living room in front of the TV where Tim had expected him to be. Instead, Tim found him sound asleep on his bed, curled halfway under the comforter in a pair of sweats and an old t-shirt that Tim recognised as his. It didn't particularly surprise him that Ray had looted his wardrobe, because he knew for a fact that there wasn't a single piece of clean clothing left in either of their duffels. It looked like Ray had fallen asleep while waiting for Tim to come out of the shower, finally overwhelmed by his bone-deep exhaustion.

Tim couldn't help smiling. There was something about this situation that left him feeling warm all over. He couldn't put his finger on what exactly it was, maybe the way Ray looked comfortable and at home in Tim's apartment, in his bed, even in his clothes. Maybe it was the trust he showed by falling asleep in Tim's bed, never doubting that he was welcome. Maybe it was the bandana he'd wrapped loosely around his left wrist as if he didn't want to let go of it, never mind that it was still as dirty as their clothes in the laundry room.

Tim went to his wardrobe and pulled out a t-shirt for himself before he sat down on the bed and tugged on the comforter until it was draped over both of them. He lay down and wrapped his arm around Ray's waist, pulling him close without giving it a second thought. Ray cuddled against him immediately, seemingly not bothered at all to be the little spoon.

"Sleep?" Ray mumbled under his breath, obviously not really awake, and Tim couldn't help a chuckle.

"Yeah." Tim pressed a kiss on the skin of Ray's neck before he buried his nose in Ray's hair and closed his eyes. "Sleep, Josh."


End file.
